Braxton Taylor
Service academy pranks are legendary, especially on the eve of a football matchup between two of the schools. But despite having the most Commander-In-Chief’s Trophy wins, the Air Force Falcons are kind of a third wheel when it comes to these sorts of stunts. The best pranks happen between Army and Navy, mostly because the Army-Navy Game is just a more storied game. It’s simply hard to compete with 124 years of burning, government-sponsored rivalry.
This year, however, Army pranksters have outdone themselves in the lead-up to the annual Army-Air Force game. They pulled off a magnificent joke for all of Colorado Springs to see, a prank for the ages that knocks not only the Air Force Academy and its struggling football squad, but the entire Air Force as a whole.
The Air Force Academy Falcons are struggling this season with only one win, their season-opening 21-6 victory against Massachusetts’ Merrimack College. They are currently at the bottom of the Mountain West Conference with zero conference wins and a losing schedule that includes a 34-7 shellacking against Navy on Oct. 5. On Saturday, they face No. 21 Army on the road — while their home stadium was defaced earlier in the week.
The upper bleachers of Falcon Stadium are colored so that the words “Air Force” can be read when the stadium is empty. But this week, Army (or its fans, no one really knows) found its way into the empty arena and painted it to read “Chair Force” for passersby. For those not in the know, “Chair Force” is an insult used by other branches to criticize the Air Force’s (real or perceived) lack of physical fitness — and the fact that much of its work can be done from a comfy chair.
Although it’s likely that Air Force-related pranks occur more regularly, they don’t often make national news like their Army and Navy rivals. One time, Naval Academy Midshipmen (allegedly) painted one of the vintage aircraft on the AFA’s grounds in Blue Angels colors. In another incident, West Point was forced to apologize after an attempt to steal Aurora, the Air Force falcon mascot, left the bird injured.
Meanwhile, pranks between Army and Navy not only capture the attention of the national media, but also catch the eyes of state police helicopters.
On at least 10 occasions since 1953, West Pointers have successfully kidnapped Navy mascot Bill the Goat, a live goat (now in its 39th iteration) Navy uses despite also having a mascot costume. The one time Navy responded with a mascot heist of its own, it successfully stole all four of Army’s mules after a year of planning, training and preparation (also by zip-tying six West Point employees, duct-taping them to chairs and cutting phone lines).
Other legendary-level pranks include Navy Midshipmen dressing as cadets to steal some 36 Army guidons (unit flags) in 1974, Army hacking into the Naval Academy’s email to troll Midshipmen in 2012 and Army Cadets releasing a fake press release, which announced the city of Annapolis proclaiming a “Go Army Day” in 2015. Luckily, no animals were harmed in any of these most recent academy sports pranks.
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