Why You Should Stop Listening to Everyone — Almost

Maybe this happened to you. You’re preparing to separate from the military and suddenly, everyone from your spouse to your CO to the “experts” you follow online to your unemployed brother-in-law have advice for you. They all mean well, but unless they’ve navigated a corporate hiring pivot or a federal resume lately, their advice amounts to support, not strategy.

Beyond the staggering 45,000 veterans service organizations (VSOs) offering career services such as resume writing and interview preparation, an ocean of influencers, mentors and coaches offer career transition advice, tools and resources. While the availability of help is a blessing, the sheer volume can create a paradox of choice in which the service member becomes paralyzed by conflicting or overwhelming guidance.

Signal vs. Noise: Vetting Your Military Transition Resources

With all this available advice and guidance, how do you evaluate which is best for you? Do you listen only to those who’ve been through the military transition and ignore civilians who speak from a different perspective? Do you rely more heavily on friends and family who may know you more intimately and want to support you through the emotional lens? Do you read books, take classes, sign up for paid assistance? Here are five ways to evaluate the advice you’re getting:

1. Like for Like

Avoid sites or resources that aren’t relevant to your situation. For example, if you are retiring with multiple advanced degrees, and you’re exploring resources for service-disabled veterans who don’t have deep education, the advice might be off target. Source information that more closely matches your situation.

Read More: Why Won’t the Contacts in Your Network Help You Find a Civilian Job?

2. Get References

Read reviews of books and training programs. Talk to past clients of professional coaches and advisors. Ensure that the advice they tout is what you need help with and is praised by people you can trust.

3. Clarify and Question

Someone’s advice to a broad population may not be right for your individual needs. If you’re unsure whether the advice or guidance will be helpful, ask clarifying questions to grasp the goals, structure and resources this source can offer. Map that to what your goals and needs are to ensure you’ll have a positive and productive experience.

Read More: Is That Job Posting Real? 10 Ways to Spot a Scam

4. Trust Your Gut

While this time can feel uncertain and unfamiliar, your gut is still a great asset. Does something not seem right about what’s being presented? Is there a part of you that doesn’t understand the benefit you’ll receive? Are you uncertain about whether to trust the individual providing the information? Your gut is your intuition. Use it to learn more — or to walk away.

5. Listen and Learn

While your intuition is valuable, you’ll need to discern between your gut warning you of a bad idea and your ego resisting a necessary, albeit scary, change. As you navigate the myriad resources and advice, some of what you’ll hear might feel uncomfortable, unfamiliar and downright crazy (“I have to ask complete strangers to help me?!”). Instead of discounting it outright, evaluate what you’re hearing with an open mind. Strive to listen without judging; and learn whether your discomfort is your gut telling you to stop or that you’re entering new territory.

As you enter the transition phase of your career, refer to this list to help you stay open yet grounded. Once you’ve filtered the noise, commit to a process that is tested, vetted and right for your mission. If that means telling your brother-in-law to keep his thoughts to himself? You have my permission.

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